keep away from the counter displays
the silver designs, the white gowns the glass
don't handle those bottles they've get foreign names
i've heard they're full of a leprosy gas
it looks just like water, but i think it's called clone
don't let it get out, it'll never leave you alone
it poisons the air, it turns it to stone

it's got the sperm of a whale, it's got the bile of a cat
it's got the sex organs out of a deer: i smell a rat
it's got the glands of a beaver, it's got naptha, it's got oil
it's got acid and copra and tar: it makes me boil

it's covered in boxes, they hide it in jars
it's trapped up in ribbons and tinsels and stars
and that's what it's for: pretty camouflage

it's got civet and benzone and rose, styrax and jasmine and musketone
and citron and resin and phenyl-propyl-alcohol: it stinks

(art makes science smell nice, it turns air into sex)

dick witts text by richard witts